Why am I here again, and why can't I find the door to get out?

 Not gonna lie, out of all the things I expected to do on the last week of 2022, becoming obsessed about an old tv show about bright-coloured spinning ninjas made of lego was not one of them. AND YET, here I am! Doing just that! And I love it hate every second I am stuck in this hole that I jumped in by myself

SO YEAH. That's what I've been doing this week!
ADHD is a magical experience that takes you for a ride, that's for certain.

 I'm just hoping this Ninjago phase doesn't last for 6 months (like the Hamtaro obsession I had earlier this year) but if it does you bet I'm going to make the most of it and try to get as much comic experience out of this as possible!
I've already successfully made a short sketch comic about Zane and Kai within 3 days. That bodes. But honestly, everything is always unpredictable and I'll play it by ear.
Who knows what's going to happen in 2023 after all!

... literally anything, and that scares me. But it always does, so it changes nothing. I'll keep doing my best and take it one day at a time.

I don't have anything much to say, but I can say 2022 was a year that I'm glad happened, despite all the crazy things that I had to live through.
Sure, I didn't make that portfolio that I said I'd try to do at the start of this year (and in all honesty I completed forgot I was meaning to do that XD) but I looked back at all the things I posted on Instagram and I was like "Cool! Look at all this stuff I did! How'd I do any of this??" so that must mean I did good! :3 And I'm content, so what more do I want right now?

And despite my anxiety, I did a lot of new things that I've never done before, AND I survived a few bad spells without giving into the inner darkness and turmoil. So that's cool too!

Anyway! I've got things to do, and only 4 hours until the new year, so I'm going to go and enjoy myself.
I'll see you all next year! I hope all of you guys survived 2022, and may 2023 be full of good things and good people for all of you <3 Take care!

The magic of Sun and Rain

 It's the Eve before Christmas, and yet I am stuck still thinking it's November and feeling like it's October.
What else is new, though?

 Intellectually I am aware it is Christmas Eve, but emotionally? Well, I'm not quite there yet.
Maybe it's because it's been a lovely and cool summer so far, and because it's not hot enough to melt my skin I've been stuck thinking "Oh, it's not Christmas yet. Gotta wait a little bit longer" and it still hasn't happened yet.

And maybe it's because I've been thinking about other things lately. I haven't had any interest in the holiday spirit or even listening to Christmas music. This is fine; Christmas is a state of mind anyway, and once January or February rolls around I'll probably let all my festivities out in then. I'm not bound by any mortal or law to celebrate holidays at the traditional months or weeks.
For now, I'm content with resting and drawing my brain kiddies a little more.

Been drawing Sadness a lot this week because I needed to look after her, but now I feel like I can trust Joy to look after her for me.
It's been a nice, dark and rainy Christmas Eve today. Even if I don't feel any holiday spark, I at least felt these two getting along and working together to create memories I'll cherish (or forget) for next year.
Who knows what's going to happen next year. But at least this year is almost over and I'm still here, so that's a good start.

Still can't believe I drew a little comic about these two last year to be honest XD I don't know how I did that.
But anyway! I hope you guys have happy holidays and I'll see you all again next week to sound off the old year. Hope you're all doing okay too <3

Little Emotions

Behold! Little tiny Emotions, to brighten your day and mine!

 They're small and full of big feelings, and I am here for it

Sweet Sadness

 How're you doing, folks? Having a good day? Yes? No? Maybe?
Well, having a little Sadness in your day is bound to make it better. I know mine did when I drew her! <3

 So if you're not having a good day, accept the inevitability of needing a few minutes of quiet time and let yourself be absorbed by the loving embrace of someone who knows exactly what you're going through right now.
You don't even have to thank her- she does it because she loves you and wants a few minutes of quietness too.

Go to her.
... or don't. You don't have to right now. She'll be there all the same until you need her.
It's all cool. XD

Sitches and Stars

 My head is empty. There is not a thought in my head except of pokemon and anxious wrecks trying to please everyone and having no idea how to do it without having a breakdown.

But there is this thing I drew a few days ago, and I think it's pretty neat! So why not. Let me share with you good folks.

I've been thinking about drawing stitches like constellations for a while. I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out.
You may go about your day again. I shan't disrupt you again until we meet again briefly next week <3

The Pokemon obsession is Real, folks

Take a wild, random stab in the dark and guess what I've been doing this week.
Uh-huh. Playing Pokemon Scarlet/Violet.

And I might've gotten a little.... invested on the way.

 

 I am honestly shocked how quickly I became obsessed with this game, considering I was intensely indifferent to it's announcement, video game trailers, and eventual release into the wide world. Yet I have been consumed in my new adventures with my little singing fire crocodile and have woken up early and gone to bed late almost every night because I've been playing this game so much.
I need to sleep for a thousand years, but that can wait until I've finished the game. XD

"What do you mean tomatoes aren't supposed to stab you like this"

Howdy everyone! Nice to see you all here again this week.
I could talk about  a few things I did during the last few days, but honestly the most interesting thing I did was finding out I've been allergic to tomatoes for most of my life and didn't realize it until someone said "and if you ever eat something that makes your mouth numb or tingly, it's probably an allergic reaction!" XD

Okay, so 'allergy' is probably an overreaction XD I don't get sick when I eat tomatoes, and the worst thing that happens to me is my tongue feels like a pincushion, but I'm still amused that it took me this long to figure out I had an allergy to one of my favorite savory fruits

And to make things even better, I made a quick comic about this truly riveting and exciting discovery (and I'm not even being sarcastic about it! XD)

I'm now hyper aware of this new thing that's in my life, but I expect the novelty will wear off after a little while.
Until then I'm still chuckling at myself because good grief it's very funny learning this kind of thing about yourself, and it WOULD take me this long to figure out something so obvious and I love it

Baltering

 *Deep and intense sigh of relief* glad that week I had was better than the last one. Still feeling anxiety and tiredness, but the anxiety is the normal cycle I'm used to and the tiredness is deserved because I've been drawing a lot (and enjoying every second of it too)

Joy's doing better too.
Can't believe they were falling apart not even 2 weeks ago... memory is fickle, but good thing I've made records, so maybe I can use my new experiences as fun anecdotes one day.

 

Anyway!  Even if these are just sketches, they made me really happy to draw and I'm actually proud of how fluid they feel to me.
The simple colors and shading pleases me a lot too- low effort, but I kinda dig it honestly <3

Hope you guys are doing well on whatever end your on. I'll see you again next week, and I wish you the best on whatever quest and trivial trials you're on.

Assuaging the Unyielding

 Cool. That was a week I just went through.
Somehow I got through it all though, and I'm... actually kinda glad all of the bad stuff happened to me. Well, not bad per se. Just super uncomfortable and I wanted it to stop. But there was a lot of good things that came from the uncomfortable feelings, and I'm grateful for them all.
okay, maybe not all of them, but hey! Character development is character development, amiright? I can't be fussy how I grow as a person XD

 Or, I guess I should say I shouldn't be fussy how my Joy gets character development. But it's more or less the same thing in the long run.
My stubbornness to be cheerful and look at everything in the best possible light can be admirable, but when I'm ignoring reality and pretending I'm not dying on the inside it becomes a destructive habit I don't have the strength to break. Or something like that, anyway.
This isn't a new problem for me, but it's one I think I'm finally coming to terms with.

I'll watch with interest and see how I (and my emotions) keep developing.

Christmas Beetle Nostalgia

 Once again I am tired, but it's a different flavor of tired and I approve of the variety.
At least I'm starting to draw without feeling like death again. That's a good start.
Hopefully when November hits I'll feel more better, but we'll see. <3

..... oH NO I just realized it's almost November!! OCTOBER!!! You have betrayed me by ending so soon! What am I going to do now it's getting warmer with longer days?
Grin and bear it, I guess XD Like I do every year.

 But one thing I'm actually looking forward to about summer is the hope of these lil' guys coming out again- Christmas beetles!
I didn't see many last year, and I'm a little afraid they might not come back this year.. but it'd be neat if they did <3 I miss these cute buggers a lot.

Rest

 A week later and I'm still thinking about my Inside Out emotions.
It's just nice knowing they're in the background of my mind and they're doing a lot better than they were last year.

Even if I'm too mentally tired to think about the hard stuff, it's good to have them in times when rest is needed. Rest means it's time to wait, and waiting means safety. Safety is good.

"You can feel the 70s crawling up your back, and it's very colorful"

 Ahh.. I've been thinking about giving my Inside Out emotions tie dye shirts to wear for a while, but I guess this week was the perfect time to do it.

 I am still mentally tired, but I am happy how these turned out.

Lots of squid kid sketches (and one octo lad)

*Me, looking at the weeks of hints and obvious signs my body has been giving me about needing a real rest and the chance to recover from another burnout phase* "Is this laziness?" XD

Nah but seriously, I've had a nice week. I was of course a little frustrated I couldn't draw or study art like was hoping, but I made it out alive and I don't feel too bad right now. Splatoon3 came at a good time because it's given my brain something more interesting to do than look sadly at my cintiq tablet and wish I could draw without feeling like death. So that's a thing I'm really thankful for.

 

 I've also been revisiting all my splatoon characters and being delighted I have more ideas about them now. :3 When I get more energy I really want to draw them some more.... but for now all those stories will have to stay in my head. Boo! XD

I wish you guys the best and I hope your surviving despite everything life is throwing at you. Catch y'all next time! <3 (hopefully with more energy)

Dark sky, Bright rain

 Hm. Despite my scrupulous savings, I am still short on change this weekend.
No, I don't mean money. I mean mental energy. Haha, been one of those weeks where every actions seems so expensive to do, and I've been avoiding anything 'unnecessary' for the last few days now. Also my perfectionism habits are creeping back in, and I don't like that. XD

But anyway! It's been a good week, and I'm glad it's almost over now. And now enters a new month full of new surprises and trials! ..... But I'll deal with that nonsense tomorrow. When I've got the spoons for it.

 Not much to say about this artwork. :3 I start sketching it a few weeks ago, and then CPS crashed on me and I thought I had lost it forever. Then I discovered (a few days later, still a few weeks ago) that some of it was spared from being lost to the ether! Much rejoicing was had!
And then after I had finished sketching it and colored it, I forgot about it for a week like the ADD person I am XD And then I added shading and special effects a few days ago. A wild ride for a picture I didn't think would be so much trouble, and yet here we are <3

Yeah. I'm just gonna.. go now before I run out of cash for the rest of the night. That cool with you guys? Cool!
See you lads next week! Hope you have a good one until then <3

8 years of this blog and my weekly shenanigans

 Ay. So, out of all the things I was expecting this week, becoming overwhelmed with life's trivial challenges was not one of them XD But! Despite those little setbacks, I managed to create what I wanted. It might not be clean or pretty, but it's mine and I think it sums up the mood of this very special day adequately.

 

Since it UV's 8th anniversary, I figured it'd be appropriate to draw our favorite dragon-spider getting a special-... *squints closer* birthday sandwich? Sandwiches. It's clearly just a lot of individual sandwiches stacked on top of each other with candles jammed into any corner that would take 'em. But it's festive! Who doesn't love eating a flaming tower of bread with thin slices of savory fruit, meat and cheese in it? XD Fang would! And he is! <3
Haha ahh... seriously though. It's nice seeing this dork again.

But that wraps it up for this year's little dedication to the blog that has seen me through all my teenage years and beyond. I'll keep trotting along and throw my art on here every week as usual, rain, hail, snow or sun. Or tornado. I hope there won't be any tornadoes, but if there are I'll still do my best and give you something nice to look at! It is my pleasure and duty to do so after all! <3 And it's a habit that's harder to break than keep, so why not! XD
*Raises sandwich high in the air like a cocktail* Cheers, y'all! Enjoy your day, and I wish you all the best in your journeys! Hope to see you all next year <333

"That's CAPTAIN Lance to you, peasant!!"

 WHELP. I wish I could say I drew a lot this week, but I spent most of my time obsessively playing Splatoon3, and the one thing I was trying to draw last night crashed and I lost it into the ether XD Which is a shame because I was doing some pretty impressive things with umbrellas and perspective, but I guess I'll have to try again another time. *thumbs up*

Anyway! Uhh.. had some tough and draining days halfway through the week, but I came out of it okay and I hope I can find the energy to socialize later. But for now, you guys can have some of the only sketches I made this week. :3

 

 Lance has been my interpretation of Agent 3 since Splatoon1, waaay back in 2015 and when I first started playing the game, and since 'Agent 3' has developed and grown up in the course of Splatoon2 and Splatoon3, of course Lance did too!
Lance ain't excited about replacing Cuttlefish as the leader of the new (NEW!) Squidbeak splatoon, but he's at least capable and knows the job has to be done by somebody, so he's accepted the role gracefully enough. He may not be allowed to go on the missions he used to do all the time when he was a kid, but I reckon he's very supportive of Agent 3.5 and enjoys sassing his childhood idols whenever possible. They've all been through a lot, and he deserves to be a little sarcastic. As a treat! XD
Seriously though, he's still working on trauma and opening up to let others help him more. Progress is slow, but it's being made. I can't wait to finish Hero-Mode so I can see what shenanigans he'll have to go through this time! >:3

Anyway. Hopefully the inconvenient iron-grip of hyper-fixation will lessen next week, so I'll draw something more impressive next week. But no promises! <3
I hope you guys had a decent - or at least not terrible - week, and I'll see you all in seven days again. Stay safe!

Cottagecore Showers

 Evenin' one and all! Another week passes by into obscurity and memory, and I am okay with this. Despite the stresses and little annoyances I've had to suffer this week, it hasn't left any lasting impression on me this Saturday, so I feel... not content, but that odd mixture between relief, tiredness and gladness that everything is over and can begin anew tomorrow. Hopefully with more enthusiasm XD

Anyway. I've been thinking of one of my little stories again- one of the ones that still hasn't got a name or any real plot, but the vibes have been soothing me when I'm kept awake with insomnia or just want something nice to think about. And rain. That bright, intense kind of rain that makes everything inside seem dark in comparison, even when it's still the middle of the afternoon. And I guess I got inspired after I had finished some figure drawings this week.

I literally kept the loose and messy sketch and added all the color and lighting I wanted until it almost looks like I've made a really nice picture. Not perfect, obviously, but I'm happy with what I've created and I hope I can do something like this again soon.

Anyway! I hope you guys are having a nice weekend, and I wish you all the best for you trails and joys to come in the following days. *finger salute* See ya again next week! <3

Sunflower Sheriffs, Hamtaro & Bijou

Howdy folks! August is over, and with it the final wisps of winter are beginning to fade in my memory. Or, they would, if it wasn't actually very nice and cool right now XD But the point is September is here! The season that makes me feel like we can't POSSIBLY be so far into the year already, and simultaneously makes me feel like Christmas will be next week. It's confusing, but despite all the contradictions I feel in my soul, September is my favorite month. And also the most nostalgic.

Anyway! Even after all these months my Hamtaro obsession still hasn't been satisfied, so you're getting some more hamsters this week.

  What started as one shenanigan sketch of Bijou holding a sword turned into two pictures that I'm honestly pretty happy about! And I also learnt how juttes work. That was an interesting bonus.
Also trees! I've started downloading more materials to help me in CPS, and I'm very happy how much time I saved downloading a maple leaf brush. (Literally hours of work and tears spared.)
It may be less authentic, but I am still happy with the result.

Also the colors are nice. :)

Scarves for DAYS

I did it! Took 3 days to finish it, but I did it! I drew them all! I drew the main 15 hamsters of Hamtaro! And they're all sharing scarves!

 It's not height accurate but that doesn't matter because these guys are still all adorable and I love them.
Scarves are a lot of fun to draw, for the record.

Sacred Fire Blossoms

Well!  I had an unusually bad case of insomnia earlier this week and in order to keep myself amused I went through the list of all my worlds and stories and found that The Interstellar Institute sparked joy that night, and so I used these nerds to relieved the boredom of staying awake until almost dawn. And then I didn't stop thinking about them because I remembered "Oh wait, I actually had some pretty fun ideas for these guys"
Hence why I was inspired to draw one of the scenes that's been in my head for a year or two.

This didn't com out 100% to what I imagined, but it's still pretty good and I'm content with what I've made. I like how the glowy petals came out, and while the perspective isn't great I'm very happy my understanding of it is increasing. Which probably explains my frustration XD

The M.M. Boys are on the scene!

Don't mind me, just drawing some awful hamster boys again. Like you do on a typical Sunday weekend.

Drawing this made me very happy. At this point these two dorks are comfort characters because I can draw them so easily without needing a reference or anything else in my tank besides a desire to see them again.
It's good.

Chromatic Killer

 Finally! Art Fight is over! I AM FREE!
It was a good time and I'm glad I participated again this year, but I glad to be free from the war again.

I drew art for a different kind of war though, and it came in two different flavors!

 I've had a pretty good mental image of drawing this guy in a (almost) completely grayscale picture for at least a year, but I finally got round to drawing it a few weeks ago. I think during Art Fight? Because I needed a break and I thought I could finally do my idea justice? I can't remember anymore. It's been too long.
The point is I had a lot of fun with this picture and I learnt a lot about keeping my values straight. Also snake skin! That was a neat experiment that I'm looking forward to repeating one day.

Some Art Fight Hamsters (week 3 & 4)

I realized one day too late last week that I had forgotten to update my weekly art post, and then after feeling some minor regret for missing something so ingrained in my routine I forgot all about it again and figured I could mash week 3 and 4 together.
So I am XD

In all fairness, last week was pretty busy because  I was visiting my grandmother, sooo I didn't have much time to draw anyway. But still! The principle must stand!
I'm pretty happy with these three drawings though.

I might squeeze in one more hamster Art Fight picture tomorrow (because AF lasts until the first day of August) but this is basically what I've been accomplished this year! I had a lot of fun, and I'm looking forward to doing it ALL over again next year!
Maybe not with so many hamsters, but y'know XD

Some Art Fight Hamsters (week 2)

Only half as many hamsters as last week, but I've still drawn more hamsters than not so far on Art Fight, so I'm not complaining. XD

This week we had the equivalent of Batman and an evil J. Jonah Jameson, so I think it's been a good week!

 I've got at least 5 more hamsters bookmarked, so with any luck I'll draw them all by next week. Or at the very least by the end of July. We'll see how it goes!

Some Art Fight Hamsters (week 1)

 Well! It's started, folks! This is my first serious week of participating for Art Fight. 6 artworks in total- 4 of which were hamster characters
I'm not saying I'm going to make every attack against hamsters this year.. but I am targeting them with the biased sway of someone who has been obsessed with Hamtaro for over 3 month and would very much like to use the new skills they got during that time.

The hamster oc owners won't know what hit them! XD

Tiger Twins comic panels

Busy week! Interesting week. Pretty good week. I've finished sketching (and coloring) all the Hamtaro comic panels I've been working on since early June (despite my initial fears of burnout), Art Fight has officially started, and lots of other shenanigans have happened since I've last uploaded.
I'm tired, but content.
Mostly tired, tho. XD

 

I still can't believe I managed to color all 14 panels (not counting sketches) in a week. Especially these four. Backgrounds have never been my forte, and definitely not perspective! yet I'm reasonably proud of how these came out. Not perfect, but they'll do, and that's all I need from them.
Gonna start posting these on Instagram tomorrow.

I'll be too busy with Art Fight to sketch any new comics for a while, but I'm actually hyped to continue this lil' story if I can. Ah, but we'll see.

Hippie Hamster

  Bit of a rough week, but I think I've gotten through it without any long term damage, so that's a good start! I'm not feeling like death, so with any luck a few more days of rest and I can start getting (slowly) back into my art studies or something.
Unless I'm jinxing myself, in that case I'll just spend another week not doing much. This is fine.

 Jingle has been sparking an unusual amount of joy this week, tho. He really does grow on you with his quirky ways and nonsensical rhymes.
Plus he's so scruffy and fun to draw. :3

Smudge and Ebony character sheets

 Whelp! Finally figured out I have a small touch of burnout yesterday. It's been building up over the past week (or month, I have no idea) but I didn't connect the dots until now. Which is unusually sharp for me, now that I think about it XD
Hopefully I'll sort out this problem soon. And if not........ well. I was only trying to crack the mysteries of perspective and finish sketching out a Hamtaro comic. Nothing that can't wait, I guess.

 I was going through all the things I had drawn this week trying to figure out what I could share, and then I remembered I made some character sheets for Smudge and Ebony for Art Fight!
And they are of better quality than anything else I've made this week, soo... Yeah.
This is what I've done lately.

Tiger Twin Thieves

 Another week goes by and I'm a little deeper in this hamster hole than I was before.
How do I know that?
I've started making comics about them. XD

 We've brainstormed a few ideas over the weeks, but the one I'm working on during the evenings right now is a Maxwell, Stan and Sandy story. The twins are petty crooks masquerading as street performers, and Maxwell is the captain of the royal guard trying to catch the 'Tiger Thief' without knowing there's two of them.
It's a lot of fun. And if nothing else, it's giving me a good excuse to practice my perspective and storytelling abilities. And I REALLY need that.

Hamster Gal Pals

Well.
I'm now so deep in the Hamtaro obsession I've started designing ocs.
This is now a thing I'm doing with my life.

No regrets whatsoever tho! <3

Te Wo Tsunagou

 To say I like all the Hamtaro Japanese songs might be an understatement. Just a tiny one! But it's till an understatement.

They have no right to be this adorable, and yet here we are. <3

Two dorks making Big Sales

 "Breaking news! Local Italian man teams up with his future son-in-law and they combine their business charisma to make big sales, more at 6"

No but seriously. I adore Curtis' relationship with Zack and Goldie. The man is willing to ditch his own shop and help out the second he thinks they need it. Literally pushed Goldie aside, told her to get some rest, and took up the slack and started shouting advertisements to the public. What a guy!
Zack is also a good little businessman. He might've learnt most it from his mum, but he clearly picked up a few things from his neighbor too.
They make an adorable team. 

Anyway. That's how I spent my Thursday.
No doubt I'll be doing this again in the near future.